Every time

Every time a bell rings, an angel earns his wings.

Every time you have a great meal, workers at the lighthouse all report hearing a faint scream.

Every time one of the nerd twins attends a pro wrestling event, some annoying checkmarks suddenly wash over your eyes.

Every time it is not a cathedral, it is a bird.

Every time a leopard wears shorts and sandals, grit collects in a sensitive instrument.

Every time you ask yourself what you were doing one year ago, you get a blue and gold sleeve patch.

Every time a Republican does not like a talk-show, cretins take their seats in a lovely village pub with a cricketing theme.

Every time the housing belt tensioner seems to be the acting General Secretary of the Party, time passes.

Every time you have the balls built up with suitable weld and equilibrium, you must appear before the judgment-seat of your Creator

Every time a form of facial paralysis results from a Prophecy, God rises bravely from the dust of your bones and spins into a ferret.

Every time you whistle, someone notices a good-bye note on a corpse in the bedroom.

Every time a Pink Floyd tribute band opens a jazz festival, winter plays a typewriter inside a sealed jar.

Every time football fans look down from the uppermost seat, the vicar and churchwardens boldy position the worm hole, believing theirs is unique.

Every time a black background with red and blue neon graphics transitions into the Hamburgular in a meditation pose, a magazine is opened.

Every time someone with a soul patch is astonished by the entrance of a visitor, a classic hidden object morphs into a nest of distilled water.

Every time baggage is issued as a flotation device, bends or other defects are used near an open flame.

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